What Should I Do If I Discover That My Lover Is Actually a Confidential Informant?

This question is the phrasing of an actual question that was received. This is always somewhat of a tricky situation. Informants are usually sworn to secrecy and aren’t allowed to tell anyone what they are doing, not parents, not spouses, not roommates, and not lovers. So I suppose the first thing that I would suggest would be that you do not confront this person about whether they are an informant. It goes without saying that if your lover is working with the police that you must mind your p’s and q’s around that person. While a spouse cannot testify against you due to spousal privilege, this does not apply to unmarried couples. They could very well end up as a witness against you. You should also prepare yourself for a day when their work becomes public and they are forced to testify in court and have their identity revealed. This could potentially bring retaliation against them (and you by extension). It could also lead people to believe that you are working as an informant as well. It may be a good idea to separate yourself from the situation a little bit until the informant work is completed.

Learn more about the role of confidential informants.